HAUSOFAMMO
Eff.ey.gee Man.if.esto

Poetic-prose musing on my experience with love in NYC


A.

Before moving back home to Los Angeles, my best-friend confided in me that he moved to New York City to find love. Little did he know the workings of this new city, this trap. I grew up here, so this will always be home, my territory, and as such, I am equipped with a knowledge that is earned solely through experience.

It is next to impossible to find love in New York, especially if you are a queer man. Faggot culture perpetuates faggot stereotype: persistent possibly-maybe promiscuity: play the field until you find the best option, and even then, never settle. Because, falling in love is settling, and to find yourself doing so is unsettling; because it is all a gamble, a bet, an unsettled debt to yourself to be as care free, and fuck free as you can be. Here in NYsea we have a full selection, any color, size, taste to satisfy your erection, an election for the best candid-date where you always win. The erect-oral college. Happy birthday mister president!

Except, you don’t often win, truly. And, as easy as it is to get re-erected, you are quickly rejected.


B.

Wannabe ballers, shot callers, ballers. Playa please. You want to play the game? The field is filled with little leaguers, and I’m the MVP: Most Valuable Pussy.

I am educated, street smart, intellectual, worldly, romantic, passionate, vulnerable, sensitive, astute.

I pay attention to detail, and I am good listener.

I have a loving and generous family, the most beautiful, fabulous, talented friends in New York City.

I am ambitious, determined; I work and play hard. I’m a boss.

I am a vegetarian, I do yoga. I treat my body like a temple.

I am spiritual and open-minded. I am an indigo child.

I channel the goddess. I honor the earth and respect its inhabitants.

I am queer. I am unique and individual.

I have a big uncut Dominican dick, a bubble but, a six pack, and smooth clear skin.

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